NICK KYRGIOS says he self-harmed, considered committing suicide and visited a London psychiatric ward four years ago as he battled drink, drugs and depression.
The Australian tennis star will reveal all his inner demons in a new episode of Netflix’s Break Point series, which followed the fortunes of top tennis stars last year.
Nick Kyrgios self-harmed and ended up in a psych ward after Wimbledon 2019
The 28-year-old and members of his inner circle have given a candid and emotional insight into what he went through in the summer of 2019 as he lost to Rafa Nadal in the Wimbledon second round.
The world No.25 reached rock bottom, pushed away his nearest and dearest, drank regularly at the Dog & Fox pub in Wimbledon Village and wore an arm sleeve on court to cover up his self-inflicted cuts.
Kyrgios explained: “2019 was the lowest point of my career.
“That pressure, having all eyes on you, the expectation, I couldn’t deal with it.
“I hated the kind of person I was. I was drinking, abusing drugs, lost my relationship with my family, pushed all my close friends away.
“You could tell I was hurting. My whole arm was covered in scars – that’s why I actually got my arm sleeve to cover it all.
“I was genuinely contemplating if I wanted to commit suicide.
“I lost at Wimbledon. I woke up and my dad was just sitting next to me on the bed and he was like full-blown crying.
“That was a big wake-up call for me. I was like, okay, I cannot keep doing this. I ended up in a psych ward in London to figure out my problems.”
Kyrgios travels to tennis tournaments with his girlfriend Costeen Hatzi and several members of his family.
His manager Daniel ‘Horse’ Horsfall breaks down in front of the TV cameras in one episode as he recalls how bad things got behind-the-scenes.
Horsfall said: “2019 was tough. Nick was f***ed.
“I don’t really talk about it with people, just because no-one really understood what was going on and no-one wanted to hear about it.
“Like he would come to my room, he’d be in tears. ‘Bro, I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to be here.’ It was tough.
“He hasn’t told a soul what they said (in the psychiatric clinic). That conversation they had in that room, no-one knows.”
Episodes Six (Belonging) and Seven (Saints and Sinners) of the 10-part tennis series chart Kyrgios’s run to the 2022 Wimbledon final where he was beaten by Novak Djokovic on Centre Court.
It also focuses on his fiery third-round win over Stefanos Tsitsipas, in which the pair rowed on court and then traded verbals in the post-match press conferences.
Greek ace Tsitsipas said: “Nick has brought that NBA basketball attitude to tennis. I’d describe it as an uneducated approach of playing tennis.
“But you know tennis is a gentleman’s sport, it’s all about respect. We’re not playing basketball.”
This week, Canberra-born Kyrgios returned from an eight-month injury layoff, having also had knee surgery, but he was bashed up 7-5 6-3 by China’s Wu Yibing in the Stuttgart Open first round.
He claims he will always be an outsider on the tennis circuit and not accepted due to the colour of his skin.
Kyrgios said: “I’m not going to conform to a bunch of old rules.
“I don’t care who you are, what you are, because I know I’m not really accepted.
“If I win Wimbledon, it’s like a middle finger to everyone.
“I know what I bring to the table. I know I sell a lot of tickets and I sell out stadiums all around the world.
“But I know I’m not really accepted, especially in the tennis world, being a white privileged sport.
“When I was young, I was told you could only make it if you ticked these certain boxes.
“Being bullied at a young age because I was short, fat and brown, it’s scarred me for sure.
“People confuse my confidence for arrogance at times because they have no idea what I’ve gone through. I want to prove that I deserve to be here.”
- Episodes 6-10 of Netflix’s Break Point launches on June 21 +
